Before I make you a sandwitch:

Since I am a girl, I hear the "make me a sandwitch" and "you belong in the kitchen" crap a lot. So I decided, for any guy who asks me to make them a sandwitch, I will. BUT, if we are going to play by gender roles, here are a list of things you will need to do before I make you a sandwitch:

1. Go to college. Men are supposed to be educated and smart right? So stop being a waste of space, and get a degree! If I can do it, you certainly can, right?

2. Get a job. Men are supposed to be the bread winners, right? So get up, stop playing you're xbox 360, and get a job. And not some stupid job like "Official Walmart Cashier", no something that goes 9 to 5 everyday, 5 days a week.

3. Well, not only do you have to get a job, you will have to hunt for food. How can I make you a sandwitch if you don't provide me with some meat to make that sandwitch with? And going to the grocery store doesn't cut it mister. You want to play by gender rolls? Then hunt me a turky god dammit!

4. Now I need to have a roof over my head. You got the food and the money, build me a house dammit! And a nice one, too.

5.  Alright, so provided you get some meat and money, and put a roof over my head, step five is for you to do all the yard work. The grass won't mow its self, now will it? The house needs a new fence, and as a man, you need to put it up. I'm I girl, I can't.

6. Okay, the yard is nice and clean now. Time to enlist for the army! As a man, you are supposed to protect me, right? So go out and serve this country!

If you meet all 6 of these steps, I will gladly make you a sandwitch. In fact, I will have 20 kids for you, clean the house, and sew clothes all day! But, since I am guessing none of the guys reading this have accomplished any of these things, you can man up and make your own damn sandwitch!